The Chameleon Funeral
by comealongpond
Summary: As a sick and aging Pascal nears death, Rapunzel must learn to say goodbye to her old friend.


**A/N: Something I wrote really quickly. I tried to make it very true to what I think would happen if Pascal died. Because logically speaking, he wouldn't be able to live for very long. I know Disney doesn't follow logic, but I've wondered about this before all the same. I think you will enjoy it.**

* * *

"Rapunzel, this is getting ridiculous," the King said in a frustrated voice over dinner Thursday night.

Rapunzel shyly looked up from the bundle she was hiding in her coat. She had walked into dinner wearing one of Eugene's jackets, proclaiming that it was chilly. She wasn't fooling anyone with the way she had her arm protectively placed over a mysterious bump on the right hand side. Halfway through the main course, she had tried to discreetly unbutton the jacket and tend to whatever she was hiding inside.

Oh, Rapunzel. She was so bad at being inconspicuous.

"But he's sick!" Rapunzel said desperately, moving her arm to bring the dying chameleon closer to her. Well, maybe _dying _wasn't the right word – but Pascal had definitely lost his spirit. He had turned a very dull green, almost grey. He barely moved on his own anymore, and Rapunzel had to use a bottle just to get him to drink anything.

"Brining your pets to dinner is simply unacceptable."

"Fine!" Rapunzel said, huffing in agitation. She called over one of the guards that were keeping watch outside the dining hall. "If you would please take him back into my room for me? Put him in his bed and make sure to tuck him in tightly. Thank you."

She smiled warmly at the guard, while her parents both gave Eugene a confused look. Something like "why is she still trying so hard?" Eugene shrugged a bit and went back to his soup. It was best to stay out of this dilemma and not have Rapunzel or the King and Queen disagree with him.

"Gosh, I hope he's alright," Rapunzel said, biting her lip. She kept glancing back at the door. "Sometimes he won't go to sleep unless I sing for him."

"Honey," her mother said, "you worry about him too much. I'm sure he's just fine. You'll see him in a little while, when you're done with your supper."

Eugene could hear Rapunzel muttering rude things under her breath, a rarity for her, and quickly changed the topic.

* * *

Pascal was never left unsupervised anymore. Rapunzel had hired Eugene to come in during the night and watch him while she slept, and to alert her if anything bad happened. Personally, Eugene had to agree with her parents – she was going _way _too far looking after him. He was going to die, anyway, so why was she wasting so much energy on the guy? He supposed it was because she had had him for so long. Almost nine years, if he remembered correctly.

"Hey, Rapunzel?" he asked, yawning. He was tired, but it was his job to watch Pascal sleep. They would switch off in four hours, where Rapunzel would watch him and Eugene would sleep. "How long have you known Pascal again?"

"Over nine years," she said, fluffing up Pascal's little pillow. "I met him when I was just ten years old. He was just a baby chameleon back then. He's known me his whole life."

Well, that explained how motherly she was over him. Except for the fact that she was treating that frog like a human. But Rapunzel was Rapunzel. "I see," he said.

"Yep. Goodnight, Eugene," she said, crawling into her bed.

Eugene sat down in the chair besides Pascal's bed, which was a small box placed on a nightstand. The box was filled with miniature pillows and blankets. Rapunzel had designed it all herself.

It pained Eugene just to look at the little guy. He looked so weak. Eugene wasn't an expert on animals, but he was pretty sure that he had already outlived the average chameleon. Rapunzel had tried to take him to a veterinarian, but first all, the vet wasn't familiar with lizards, and everyone knew what was wrong anyway. He was just getting old.

"As much I don't want you to die…do you think you could maybe…hurry it up?" Eugene whispered to the chameleon. It was hard to see Rapunzel so stressed out all the time. But Pascal was fast asleep – and besides, Eugene hadn't gotten a response out of teasing Pascal in months.

* * *

Eugene awoke the next morning to the sound of crying. _Oh, Christ,_ he thought. _No_.

He lifted himself out of bed and saw Rapunzel leaning over Pascal's bed. "Please wake up," she whispered. "Oh please , please, please…"

"Rapunzel," Eugene said with concern, climbing out of her bed and waking over to her. "What happened?" He was sure that he already knew the answer.

"Pascal, he…he won't wake up!" Rapunzel said, wiping her tears away with her hand. She touched her pet gingerly, but he didn't move. "I – I wanted to wake him up for breakfast, but he…"

Eugene sighed and wrapped his arms around her, pulling her into a hug. Rapunzel was glad for the gesture, using the opportunity to cry into his shoulder. "It's okay," he said. "He died in his sleep, which means that it was peaceful. That's good, isn't it?"

"Yeah…" Rapunzel said, "I guess that's good. But I…"

"I know," he said. It hurt him to see her so upset, but he understood. Even Eugene was feeling completely awful about what happened. "Why don't you just lie down? I'll go inform your parents and we can get a funeral ready."

"O-okay," Rapunzel agreed, glancing at Pascal again. She carefully laid a blanket over his head before walking to her bed.

* * *

It turned out that funerals for chameleons didn't take very long to plan. Eugene asked Rapunzel if she would be ready to do it today, and she said that it would be better than waiting.

So around noon that day, Rapunzel, Eugene, the King, the Queen, and several of the guards and servants were gathered in the back garden. Most of them hadn't bothered to change, but Rapunzel was wearing a dark grey dress, the closest to black that she had. She looked solemnly down at the patch of dirt where a servant had recently dug a hole, buried the make-shift coffin that Pascal lied in, and covered it up. Rapunzel had collected many flowers from around the gardens, and she laid them on top of the grave now.

"Pascal," she said slowly, with importance. She took a deep breath. "You were the best friend anyone could ever ask for. I love you so much, and I don't know where I would be today without you. I…I wish that you didn't have to leave me so suddenly, but at least you lived long enough to leave the tower with me, right?" She smiled a bit, her eyes watering up. "I know you enjoyed that. Wherever you are now, I hope you're very happy. I hope there are lots of oranges for you to eat and that you meet some lady chameleons, since I know there weren't very many around Corona. Love you," she finished. She took a step back and looked around at the rest of the funeral goers.

Eugene cleared his throat. He had never spoken at a funeral, not to mention one for a chameleon, but he felt that he should say something. "Well, Pascal," he said. "I know when we first met, we didn't really see eye to eye. I guess we never really did. But deep down, I always considered us friends. You definitely made life here entertaining. Oh, and…thank you for approving of me and Rapunzel's relationship. I'll be sure to look after her now you can't anymore, so don't worry about that." He felt silly for talking to a dead lizard, but oh well. "I'll never forget you," he said, nodding.

Rapunzel smiled at Eugene. He was glad that she approved of his speech. Rapunzel said some closing words, and then everybody slowly left until only Rapunzel and Eugene remained.

"I was thinking I could paint him a little headstone?" Rapunzel said, taking Eugene's hand. "I could make it nice and pretty."

"That will look nice," Eugene assured her, smiling and kissing her forehead.

Rapunzel nodded, her eyes wandering back to the grave, looking like she was about to cry.

* * *

"Now, Rapunzel," Eugene said, standing with his hands behind his back. He had bought her something in town and he was getting ready to show it to her. "I would like to say, first of all, that I know no one will ever be able to replace Pascal. I would also like to say that you've gone a month without a pet, and I can tell that you're kind of lonely. So I took it upon myself to get you a present."

Eugene quickly exited the room and came back a second later, holding a small, furry thing in his hands. "Ta-da!" he said, giving the kitten to Rapunzel.

Rapunzel squealed with delight. "Oh my gosh!" she said, cradling the kitten in her arms. "I've always wanted a cat! How did you know? Oh, it doesn't matter – oh, _thank you_! She's so cute. It is a girl kitty, right?"

"Yup. And you're welcome. I thought you'd like her," he said, proud of himself.

"Oh, I like her very much." Rapunzel smiled and sat down on the bed, petting the kitten which was now lying in her lap. "You don't – think Pascal would be jealous?"

"No," Eugene said, shaking his head. "He'd want you to be happy. Trust me. Don't you think?"

"Yes, I think so," Rapunzel said. She smiled warmly, looking back down at the feline. "Wow. We'll need to get her a name, and a bed, and some milk. I heard cats like milk."

"We can worry about that later," Eugene said, reaching forward to scratch behind the kitten's ears. It hissed at him and then rested its head in Rapunzel's lap, purring happily.

Rapunzel giggled. "My pets never do seem to like you, do they?"


End file.
